November
TJ and I were complaining about something that was quite a "process" (I don't even remember what). Later, as we carried him to the bathtub he screamed, "Stop the process!!"
Rachel: Reed, I want to get out the door, hurry and get dressed. You'll wear your red pants, gray shirt, and orange [thinking Crocs...]
Reed: Tiger.
One day while I had my hair flipped upside down before I dried it off in the shower he looked at me and said, "Mommy have noodle hair." (??)
After Facetiming with Papa Reed kept asking me what the "red spider" was at Poppy's house. We eventually had to Facetime him back and Papa walked out to his garage where we saw a red bike rack on the wall that, sure enough, looked like a red spider.
Reed's nonsensical phrase is "Conky no no" which has led to us using "conk" instead of bonk ("Be careful or you'll conk" or "Don't conk me," for example).
Calls our toaster a poster.
I gave him a treat and he hollered back, "Holy smokies!"
Reed (holding Holland's binky - dangling on a binky clip - in front of her face): I catch Holland. (I think that's the product of watching fishing videos with Papa. :)
Reed: Want pancakes for lunch. Tiny little square pancakes.
(I was panicking trying to figure out how in the world I'd pour SQUARE pancakes when I realized he just wanted them cut up. Ha!)
(After picking his nose) "I got a bug!"
Reed continues mixing "yours" and "mine." A few examples I jotted down:
Want your binky. Want own.
Cut mines toenails.
Want yours! (Really wants his)
December
Rachel: Holy smokies.
Reed: I'm not holy smokies. I'm Reed Morris.
Reed (after hearing his binky when we were moving blankets): Where's binky? Heard it snap.
Reed kept turning off the lights in the house when the Christmas tree was plugged in.
Rachel: Reed, I need you to leave the lights on.
Reed: Need to leave 'em off. Christmas shining.
One day while walking home from shoveling snow at a neighbor's house TJ turned around to see where Reed was and Reed was laying in the gutter, drinking/licking the snow.
Rachel: Reed, what do you want to give Hahn for Christmas?
Reed: A....big digger?
Rachel: Do you think she'd like a big digger?
Reed: No.
Rachel: What do you think she'd like?
Reed: Um....a pusher?
Over a period of a couple months we read "Freight Train" by Donald Crews dozens of times. One day reading another book with a train in it Reed was pointing to things in the picture and asking me what they were.
Reed (pointing to a house next to train tracks): Whose house is it?
Rachel: I don't know whose house that is.
Reed: It's Donald's house.
Rachel (baffled by how he could know who Donald Duck is, since we've never seen him): Donald who? Donald Duck?
Reed: Donald Crews.
Started calling out pallet jacks in December.
Calls the wise men "wise mans." :)
One night Reed was laying totally still on the ground, holding his raggedy, precious blankets above his face, rubbing the tags. I heard him say, "Sometimes it's really pretty, my white blanket. I just stare at it."
For Christmas I thought I was quite clever to wrap each person's presents in unique paper: Reed had red trucks and Holland had white snowflakes.
Rachel: Reed, that one is for Hahn.
Reed (looking at the present, then Holland): Merry Christmas, Hahn! (Tears it open)
The day after Christmas we helped Reed throw away his beloved binkies. It was a rough transition (that really took several weeks to get through) and the first few days were especially hard. He put them in the big garbage can in the garage by himself - us cheering him on and Facetiming everyone he loves for them to cheer him on - and on Friday as we watched the garbage truck drive past I commented about it.
Rachel: Look, there's the garbage truck.
Reed: It lift up garbage. Bye, binkies. Have a good ride!
Rachel: (silently sobbing)
At a stoplight, pointing to the birds on top of the light:
Rachel (pointing at the birds): Reed, see those birds up there? On the sign?
Reed: What kind? Pigeon? Peacock?
Clearly we need to review peacocks - ha!
Reed (pointing at a neighbor's inflatable moose decoration that was up for Christmas): What's happened to moose, Mom?
Rachel: Oh, it looks like it fell down, huh?
Reed: It have owie?
Rachel: Reed, are you sick?
Reed: No, I'm not sick. I'm nice and smooth.
January
Calls eggnog egg squash (took a LONG time to figure out what he wanted).
Reed, noticing the darkening sky: Mom, it's getting nighter?
Calls a frog a "tog"
Calls a fork a "toke"
Calls a fox a "tox"
Almost always calls TJ "Daddyo"
Waves his hand in front of him when he says no.
We got tired of changing Reed's stinky diapers and bribed him with TEN M&Ms if he'd go in the toilet. Success. The first time was just thrilling.
Reed (looking into the toilet): Fish! Daddy fish! Mommy fish! Tiny baby fish!
Every time he went more he was thrilled to find another fish.
On day two when he went he insisted that his "stinkies" were "scrambling out my leg." When I asked if he was pushing them out he insisted, "No, SCRAMBLING." (???)
In the coming days his reported findings became more and more preposterous.
Reed: Dolphin! No, three dolphins, Mom! And stable.
Reed: Lizard. No, not lizard. (I affirm, "Nope, that's your stinkies, huh?) Nope. Alligator. (Clearly he had just seen the wrong reptile at first)
Rachel: Where do you think that bus is going?
Reed (no hesitation): To Jerusalem.
(Note: this is probably a combination of numberless recitations of the Christmas story as well as Tiny being in Jerusalem on study abroad).
Rachel: Reed's runny nose has turned green again. Reed, look at Dad and show him.
Reed: What's happened to my face?
Papa (wanting to keep a secret from Reed): Rachel, the b-i-n-o-c-u-l-a-r-s [spelled it out] came if you want to use those as an incentive.
Reed: What ya talkin' 'bout, Poppy?
In the middle of scripture study:
(Reed hits Holland)
Rachel: Reed!
Reed: Wicked!
(Hits Holland again)
We see an excavator driving down the road.
Reed: Digger going to Befhem (Bethlehem) to see baby Jesus.
February
After putting both hands on Holland's head and pushing down:
Reed: Mom! I baptize Hahn!
Rachel: What do you want to do today, Reed?
Reed: Wanna walk to Befhem (Bethlehem).
Rachel: Oh, that's too far away. We can't walk to Bethlehem.
Reed (crying): Wanna walk to Befhem!
Rachel: Reed, come get your pajamas on.
Reed: I'm grateful for Dad.
Reed: Where's Dad?
Rachel: School.
Reed: I miss him like crazy cats.
Rachel: Reed, what did you do with Nana and Papa while we were gone?
Reed: Just played like crazy cats.
Rachel: You're my baby boy.
Reed: No, I'm growing up. I'm getting taller. I'm going to grow up to be a tall, tall man.
Reed (listening to TJ and me talk about putting on sunscreen when we arrive to the beach): I love sunscreen. I can just smell it.
Reed (walking through the zoo): What's that?
Papa: A bearded dragon.
Reed (seeing a bearded dragon for the first time in his life): I love bearded dragons.
We stopped at the bank to deposit a check. I didn't have a pen in the van so grabbed one that was in the little "drawer" that pops out in the drive through. I pointed out the drawer to Reed and told him they leave pens in there for people who don't have any. I also tried to explain that the bank is a place where you put money.
Reed: Who's that worker?
Rachel: His name is Robert. He works at the bank.
(Five minutes later, as we're driving home)
Reed: What does Robert do at work?
Rachel: I don't know. What do you think?
Reed: Him give pens to people.
Reed (calling from his bed at 6 AM): Mom! (Pause) Mom!!!
Rachel: Hi, Brother. What's happened?
Reed: Who's that talking?
Rachel: Everyone is asleep. I didn't hear anything.
Reed: It's Debi. Debi is talking.
(Debi is our neighbor that lives a quarter mile away)
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